Uh, I’m pretty sure our ships still float, guys.

“Faculty. Alumni. Graduates. As your valedictorian, I would like to thank my family, the professors, and most importantly, humpin’ and pumpin’. Thank you.”

I want you to know that I very much appreciate the Field of Dreams reference on a Monday morning. It’s haunting, considering the context.

Smart money on Lawrence being the book smart cliche and Schumer the party animal cliche.

Great. Next you’re gonna tell me Kokomo isn’t a place I can get away from it all.

You are such a Betty.

Ooo, I like you! Nice!

I’m having a legitimately bad day, but I watched this supercut and now...

Thank you for this. I have been telling my friends for a while now this guy is a pasty Satan incarnate. I’m glad it’s finally gaining traction.

Jon Heyman flexed his anagram skills, and tore something:

I labored over this long and hard. I played around with putting this at #1 for awhile, because the song is just that good.

Thanks for this article. I had no idea early Peanuts actually had substance. I thought it was just 50 years of MEH.

Yeah, cats have such straightforward says of showing displeasure. I wish that was a little more acceptable in “polite society.” There are a few people’s kitchen I wouldn’t mind pooping in.

The good news is, based on the comments section and what I read, women don’t have to face higher expectations, standards, or pressure than men. Progress!

Did you see how many potions and Graviballs she had in her inventory? She was bound to sink.

One very confused fan, not sure of how either homosexuality or the digestive system work, wrote “I would let you poop on my chest even if you had just finished eating Taco Bell #nohomo.”

I have never played DOTA 1/2 and have begrudgingly played LoL to appease friends. I mean its enjoyable, but not my cup of tea.

“Tom Brady’s name has appeared in a scandal that doesn’t involve deflated balls”

“The caller was just making a comment on the Cub’s season, not stadium.”