I know but that's usually because the character is so focal. Like every Batman movie ever, for action figures, has him in outfits that have nothing to do with anything but that's because they wanted to make ten Batman toys (Because Batman. As in, "He can buy/make/whatever anything! Money is its own superpower!"). …

Can they? I wouldn't know. From what I hear regarding fan investment, many don't consider them so pulpy and absurd - instead treating them as notably "realistic" within a certain frame of reference.

They should overdo it like they did with Iron Man 2 and ditch any potential plot just so they can build up the branding (for things like those figures). Age of Ultron should mostly be an infomercial for Black Widow merchandise.

I know she's had some pretty cool "collector's" merchandising and such. They can make some really awesome figures/statues/etc. of things when they put their minds to it. I'm sure that plenty of people have looked at (ironically) "figures" or the logistics of selling toys of female action figures, including those…

Ugh. These earpiece rights activists again. "All Bluetooth is created equal." Blah blah blah. Yeah, yeah. I get it. Mommy didn't buy you that walkie talkie headset you wanted so now, for the rest of your life, you'll stand up defending endless ridiculous earpieces.

I know the marketing people could make me buy Black Widow hamburgers. I just also assume that the main reason they'd so is because they saw that, for some reason, "sexy women" sell hamburgers. Which, I guess given the odd commercials for Carl's Jr., must be the case.

Yeah. It's okay. But look at Maria Hill. She has guns. And can fight a bit. Same for Fury. And Coulson. But Black Widow's a better fighter than them all. And she's probably smarter than many of them. But how do you make an action figure of those skills? Or a movie of that? When, in a lot of ways, it's the…

…The people marketing her need to know why they would buy it or else they won't make it. Which is roughly one of the same reasons they probably aren't immediately moving forward with plans for her own movie.

But there's roughly nothing to rely on is my point. You have some form of gimmick up the whazoo for many of these other random characters. Fury's nearly comparable but eyepatches aren't even as common as having red hair (Unfortunate how few people have major eye injuries…wait…no. I took a step in the wrong…

That's a good idea. They just have to focus on branding that enough that kids would care and recognize it immediately.

Enough to buy a figure of a character that does, roughly, "nothing"? I don't know.

Yeah but what's that do? Where's the gimmick, the add-on, the thing that makes a little kid go, "Oh, this isn't just a random girl toy."? She has red hair and a black jumpsuit and…she kicks. WOW, HOW EXCITING!

Looks like they caught on to that for Avengers: Age of Ultron.

Here's one of the main issues regarding Black Widow from a merchandising standpoint: What am I meant to emphasize in my "Happy Meal toy" of her? I shouldn't put guns because that's too violent. I shouldn't stress the boobs because…well, that's going to contribute to the problem of singling her out with, "She's the…

Nailed it! Also, you are correct, sir!

This explains why people say I'm pretentious yet also why they scream and run away from me. Thanks, Nunez!

Hyperbolic paranoid already guessed this.

Thus far, I enjoy how on the nose it is. It feels like the sort of pulpy, absurd stuff that used to be popular in those uh…what do you call them? Those little books on the cheap paper with the cartoons of all the characters doing stuff.

Since it's a fairly popular association with the character (even regarding his pre-villain days) and lawyers that they can be two-faced, I wouldn't be surprised to see it pop up fairly early on. I'd guess within two episodes.

I forgot that you authored the best-selling book, "How To Kill The Family Dog With Skill And Purpose." What printing is it on? I was watching the film version earlier but now I've got it on paws.