Bollywood GIF party!

Retta girl, as a former inmate at Claire's Accessories, I'm with you on the glitter thing. It's scratchy, annoying and it gets literally everywhere. #TeamNoGlitter

Actually most of us are pretty laid back about being called British. It's on our passports, we just voted to remain part of that nationality (well, 55% of us did), and it's factually accurate, although most of us identify as Scottish first, British second.

As a proud Glaswegian, I feel I should point out that we have a rather large Loyalist population that would bottle you in the face for suggesting even for a second that we weren't British. Likewise, we have a large Irish Republican population that would bottle you in the face for exactly the opposite. We're contrary…

I assume Noah will, he was in the group shot at the end...

I love how the cast list in the trailer is just a total burn on Sam Worthington not having any award noms. #andnoneforGretchenWeiners

Ha! I wish, was mid-00s! He also had long, thick black hair and bleached it a manky orangey yellow once too. Did we date the same guy? ;)

The Scumbag Ex (surprisingly not for the cornrows, he turned out to be a serial sexual assaulter) was similarly unaware of how awful White Guy Cornrows are, even with all of his friends telling him exactly why. It took me getting an earring caught in them while we were having sex for him to finally stop thinking they…

Ha! I sympathise, one of my exes got cornrows for a music festival, then decided to keep them in for 6. Weeks. Afterwards. :/ That should have been the deal-breaker right there. I am ashamed to say it wasn't, and I'm even more ashamed to say I actually helped him brush them out and wash his (minging) hair when the…

While we're at it, can we talk about how "All About the Bass," a supposed "body positive anthem," is actually the most anti woman song of the year?

My then-boss, who is also my best mate, took the phone call and had to mute herself cos she was laughing so hard. It absolutely ended us all. Best night ever.

People asking for 'salty cockporn' is a favourite in my cinema.

We had one of our cinema mystery shoppers phone us up to ask what film was on at about 8pm 'cos that as when she was "planning to come in and mystery shop us". Needless to say we got 100% on that shop and an extra £50 bonus in our pay packet for hitting top marks...

Your tombstone?

Maybe he's just leaving room for Jesus...

Ha, no. He did, when he realised I was there. Apparently he was feeling overwhelmingly guilty....

Holy shit mate, that's just cruel! I'd have bashed the computer in!

Cheers. If it helps, apparently I'm handling the whole thing better than he is, according to our friends. I'm fairly certain that ranks pretty high on the Alanis scale of irony....

I got chucked by my partner of 7 and 1/2 years four weeks ago. Suffice to say I have been taking it like a pro (endless crying, not eating, not sleeping, the usual) and my friends decided I needed to go out and have a few drinks just to get me out and socialising again. Guess who was sitting in the same pub, with…