You know how young people already think they're invincible, and here she's 16 and has already survived being shot in the freakin' head, I hope she's aware enough of how quickly and easily she could come to harm again. Or at least have people around her who are aware of that. She is just so young.

Lawyer up and break these fuckers.

The teachers thing kills me. There's a law that requires teachers to report shit like this. My mind is blown by that.

I'm sure he's enough of a Bible-humper that there's no excuse for forgetting the part about noticing a mote in your neighbor's eye while missing the beam in your own, or something like that.

you should trademark "i'm going to be [sic]" — and its usage. that's some next level shiz right there.

Totally ok to fan-girl out on Ms. Brown, she deserves all of it. I had the pleasure of doing her makeup for the vogue story and let me tell you, this woman is beyond boss! I was in awe of her beauty, intelligence and presence the entire shoot. And most of the time on photo shoots there's a stylist who helps choose…

Or by him. Isn't this what we, as women, want? To see someone genuinely changed?

Because we're big Adventure Time dorks, my husband is going as Finn ... though I really want him to do Jonathan Frakes, old Finn from the "Pillow World" episode ... and I'm going as insane, mad scientist Princess Bubblegum.

I hope it doesn't play endlessly in the margins of all gawker sites like that other Miley gif (with the foam finger) has been.

I suggested that my granddaughters go dressed as Tea Party members so they can denounce the socialism of giving away candy to everyone just because they showed up and demanding a free market Halloween solution that denies everyone any candy unless they already have candy, in which case they can keep it. Those without…

I don't have kids yet, but I've already embraced mediocrity. I'm scraping by and taking names! These ladies seem to me like they've got pretty much the ideal situation. And I'm sure their kids are happier for having a mother who's not driving herself insane trying to be perfect at absolutely everything.

"Potatoes and tomatoes mixing together like that just isn't right. Potatoes are supposed to stay in the ground like the tubers they are until they mature and are ready for whatever kind of eating is going to be done with them! None of this mixing with tomato plants nonsense. It's unnatural for vine and root to be all i…

WHY does he say To-mah-to, but then po-tay-to? I am so confused!

With a few more grafts, you could turn this into a Bloody Mary plant, since it's already got the vodka and tomato juice covered.

i'd prefer hoverDOGS, thank you.

Everyone come round my house, I'll braid you a lovely french or Dutch plait for the low low price of you bring me wine and get sloshed with me. Years of being a horsey kid made me ace at horse manes and tails and other people's hair. Still can't do my own for shit though.

Attention commenters: this piece is not about white women stealing braids from black women because black women had them first. It's about the NYT writer being an idiot and subbing "white women" in for "all women." You are still allowed to braid your hair.

Okay, I'll grant the media attention is all skewed white, but white women have been braiding hair just as long as black women have. Braids are a pretty universal way to deal with long hair. Rather than "white women" the important part of it is is "rich women" (which are generally white.) It is not because "white"…

I haven't been through it in a while, but I'm pretty sure that plaits are mentioned in Homer's The Odyssey, and you can see plaits on many pieces of ancient art.

He claimed it was a joke, but then said it shouldn't have been and things like that should never be joked about. He didn't leave it hanging out there in the wind that it was a joke.