"...sit quietly by and watch a nation of men be raised by bitter penis envying burned feministed single mothers." Crap. He's onto us.

My knees look like Winston Churchill's face. Where's MY tabloid article?

Or you could send ball pics and call them texticles. (I'm really trying to make this a thing, evidently.)

Sheesh, my 11 year old told me this weeks ago. She also says that an ussie is for two people, but when it's more than two it's called a groupie. I was all, "Uh, why don't we just call that an ussie too, since that word does not mean what you think it means."

I had had the biggest crush on this guy for a long time, but he was friends with my older brother, so nothing had happened. One night, it magically did! We were rolling around on the floor and I was thinking "I can't believe this! This is so great!" Then he goes to put on a condom, and it breaks. Turns out he doesn't…

If I was a guy, I would take pictures of my balls and send those. Not only are they more interesting and photogenic, but I could call them Texticles. (Okay, I would never actually do this, even if I was a guy).

Straight men: doing anything they can to get next to (or inside of) women's genitals since ever.

Mads Mikkelsen? More like PLAIDS Mikkelsen, amirite??

I don't know if you're just trolling or what, but have you actually ever read anything about how family courts work, or do you just like to make assumptions based on inane online rhetoric? Child support is meant to keep the child at approximately the same economic level they'd have been in if the parents had stayed…

In most couples, both parents work. In most couples, the lion's share of the childcare duties still fall to the mother.

Yep, not to mention that custody decisions are based on the "best interest of the child," which is almost always determined by who has been doing the primary caretaking of the child/ren.

Read that as Salmonella Heisenberg. Pictured a chicken in a fedora yelling, "I AM THE DANGER." I don't think I slept quite enough last night.

Well to be fair, most of us are to the left...to the left.

Do you think Hobby Lobby will at least pay for the aspirin we are supposed to press between our knees?