THIS is a high quality rant. Where I would have said to them, “go shit in your hat,” you have crafted a masterpiece. May their tears soak their iPads. I like it. Please, please write a piece on Mumford and Sons. Please!

Whenever I lowered my standards they turned out to be even bigger assholes than usual. I’m here to say this strategy is flawed! Don’t do it, ladies!

You aren’t fascinated by the story of a middle-age man in the midst of a mid-life crisis that can only be solved by sleeping with some 20-year-old college student? You must not understand Real Important Literature.

I have struggled with expressing this to young women — that the experience of A: Experiencing shocking sexist mistreatment B: Being informed that now you at the crossroads between a naive rube and a savvy member of our (literary, artistic, etc) in-crowd. If you respond to the sexism you experienced as offended and…

I wish he was as good at president-ing as he is at tipping and shoe-dodging.