How long is this truck? A mile? Two?

Now it’s only a matter of time for the Escalade V-Series to arrive. I knew this day was coming for a while, now.

Some days I have a peculiar curiosity to see what she would have come up with.

Paging Fancy Kristen.

I’ll take a rock crawling sedan and tow sports car, please.

You know that will be cool because of the ridiculousness. 

Sounds like they were having a crappy day.

This is the first electric vehicle that I am genuinely excited about.

Not only do the 2-3 other people who are the intended audience know who they are, I can also gaurantee that they are on this site.

Username checks out.

If you end up eating turkey in the O’Reilly’s parking lot, we want to hear the stories. Also, we should start a GoFundMe to get David a reliable vehicle.

Glad I’m not the only one with the entire fish market’s worth of dead fish in my house.

It’s a whale of a tale.

Let this be the case, please.

You have an awesome girlfriend. 

We have faith in you. 

Despite on odds, I think we have a winner here. We here at Jalopnik wish you the best of luck talking the Mrs. into this. Go get that 240SX!

That’s fair. This is auto only as far as I know.

This might be COTD worthy. As such, it won’t get it. My apologies and a star, Karfreek. 

On the joker lap, you have to put a bag of groceries in the trunk. Drivers are actually training for it as we speak at Walmarts near you.