I get that they’re all shitheads, but I honestly have no fucking idea who this inbreds are.

Call DT. This is a brilliant idea for a blog series.

In that moment, Randall stopped owning a Ford Expedition. He picked up his keys, and began gathering the supplies needed to change his status among Apache Junction’s HOA: This is a case of Keystone, a hacksaw, and years of pent up frustration.

My jaw seriously dropped when I got to that part. Why the fuck would you think Simone Fucking Biles is at risk of drowning?? Presumably she CAN swim if she is investing in this pool, so suggesting she can’t is... not a good look.

Shannon, with due all respect, I think she’s got this. Your headline was not titled correctly. It should have been “Baller Simone Exposes New Pool and Her Shredded Body Preparing for 2021 Olympics”

Is Jez really doing a story about “how will the short little black lady swim”??? About the most amazing U.S. amateur female athlete? Yikes.