But they didn’t have to rip us off. Make it like it never happened and designs are nothing. Porsche doesn’t need your love, but you treat us like a stranger and that feels so rough. No, you didn’t have to stoop so low. Have your spies collect some pictures and then apply for patents. Guess that we don’t need that,…

don’t worry, mexico will pay for it.

It is disturbing how plausibly that reads as a Trump quote.

“We did a great job with the chicken tax, that’s what people are sayin’, many people, a great, great job. We’re not stopping there, (crowd chants : Lock her up!) I’m imposing tariffs on turkey, and ducks and no collusion, the best tariffs, Ivanka did so well at the Olympics (crowd chants : USA! USA!).

United Airlines: “I’ll get you one there as soon as possible”

I’d say that they need a Golden Retriever.

If I were your boss I’d fire you right now. Where do you get off insulting and “laughing at” the customers who buy your product? Or rather, who don’t buy your product since you won’t give them a price LIKE EVERY OTHER BUSINESS IN THE WORLD DOES.

You definitely sound like someone I want to buy a car from. And by “buy a car from” I mean “punch in the nuts”.

Fuck off. I hate being in car dealerships. I hate negotiating; not because I’m a pussy but because I hate the lies and “I gotta talk to my manager” garbage. I don’t have the patience for it. I generally hate the bullshit car sales people spew. I guarantee I know more about the car I want to buy than the sales guy…

What if alien Elon Musk launched his space car into space 3 billion years ago, which then crashed on earth and the bacteria got out, and one thing lead to another, and Jalopnik!

I’m glad Hyundai showed it’s sense of humor, and that this car built your ant-icipation for the movie.

Fermentation produces CO2, displacing all the oxygen from the hold.

No lowball offers. I know what I have.

You’re a jerk. #blackcarsmatter

That feels like a good metaphor for how things went in the US this year.

I can’t even imagine giving a shit about how this affects my masculinity. My dick works fine, and I think this car is great. That’s enough for me.

My baloney has a first name, it’s c-o-n-t-r-a-b-a-n-d

I dunno, I think it’s generating quite the buzz.

Anything the Jalops can band together to do to help Radar? In a perfect world, we’d have a gofundme and buy the guy a new Charger, but that seems short sighted. I feel like maybe a collection to just get the guy some living money, maybe? Or something else he needs? I dunno. Figured you’d have a better finger on the…

Did you just confuse Burt motherfucking Reynolds with Tom motherfucking Selleck?