That sounds like a situation where no one wins.

But she is shaming gay-dressing yuppie scum! The short of it: no one is safe.

What I want to know is, when are they going to admit they've run out of new colors? Haven't they all been discovered already?

fair enough but she's ALWAYS discussing it!

I really couldn't give a good goodamn what Leann Rimes weighs but I do think the lady doth protest too much when it comes to this topic.

I'm a cook. Pie crust can go fuck itself.

My boss is a big deal nutritionist and she's working on a study that proves that obesity is something that mothers can pass on in vitro. So expect that to come down the pike.

I haven't seen the whole ep yet but I turned off the ranch dressing one. It was just her repeating the same lines over and over and over again. It was character-based sketch done wrong for me. I hope the rest was better.

My issue with Kim's makeup is that she wears so much of it all the time that she has nowhere else to take it. She looked exactly the same as she always does on her wedding day because it was impossible for her to look more made-up. Oh well. She is rich and famous and I am not so who cares what I think. Maybe I can get…

I kinda put PETA and Ann Coulter in the same category. Things I choose to ignore because they're beyond actually saying anything useful and instead just eat attention.

this is wonderfully bitchy. I love it.

haha. Also, re: Abby Elliott and Fred Armison being dunzo, I thought, "When were they onzo?"

Of all those items, David Beckham's thoughts on long johns is the most intriguing.

you can do this with a dog, too, and with none of the chafed nipple action.

If my husband said anything along those lines to me I'd just assume he was getting ready to murder me.

"We interacted in a lot of sexual ways because Susan enjoys doing that." Spoken like a guy who knows what sexual ways his woman enjoys interacting in.

my level, it has been dragged down to.

Sometimes I wonder how much Santorum hates gays MORE because of Dan Savage.

Don't you mean....seamen?

I'm watching this right now. That lady whispering into her daughter's—I'm sorry, her BEST FRIEND'S—ear is so creepy.