I'm actually a mathematician. And now I hope that someone breaks Robben's skull tomorrow. Not because I dislike him, but because it will make you unhappy....pal.

I'm sorry that you disagree with so many people who watch futbol and comment on Deadspin. Every non-Dutch fan (and there are many) seems to agree that Robben, though at times an extraordinary player, is clearly a recidivist diver. Given the manner in which you respond to these critiques, I urge you to go hack…

-∞

It's not just the last couple of games, either. He's been doing this for over a decade and STILL I don't see referees hesitating to pull out cards on other players when he dives. At some point they must become desensitized and think, "Well, it looked like a foul, but it was that notorious diver Robben who went down".…

A big Y? That's the angriest Mormon I've ever seen!

Asshole Grabs Asshole's Asshole, Now Has Pains In Asshole

I'm not really a Blues fan, but I root for them because I like their style of hockey and goddamnit if they could just win a Cup one time after being in the playoffs seemingly every year of their existence! Anyway, I think they've really turned a corner with the Stastny signing. They're absolutely stacked now -…

ONE MINUTE! Where the fuck did you get one minute from!

Yes, yes, very nice, but if it snows, Costa Rica has no chance to win...

It's hilarious how wrong you are! Not only will Melo never win a championship because he has no idea how to play team basketball, but he is the exact opposite of the type of player the Heat need to win. They need rebounders, defenders, spot-up shooters, and guys who succeed without the ball. Melo possesses none of…

Boring Rich, Attractive, Fairly Intelligent Person Pippa Middleton to Be Interviewed as Though because Being Interesting is not a Prerequisite for Appearing on Television

This single victory means absolutely nothing for Greek futbol, which has, will continue to, and will likely always, suck balls.

Only in Germany could this happen...

Ah yes, BARTMAN is the hero that Chicago deserves...

Fuck.

I don't know why he was so devastated. Everyone knew they were going to lose!

Tom, I already have Monday morning's headline ready to go for you:

He always did play better in the snow.

Except that was EXACTLY my original point as demonstrated within the following excerpt of my original statement:

I like golf just fine. It's just a game, though, and it doesn't save lives or feed people. That's not a subjective belief, and hence neither is the lack of Mickelson's contribution to society. Here's what a subjective belief would sound like: You're a professional douchebag.