I have always considered an expensive designer bag as theft-bait. If I can sink at least a grand into my purse, then it would be likely to contain other $$$ or valuables.

THIS. It is the least “Maverick” deserves.

Corgis are rather good at being the perfect height for ball-busting. I think my late corgi made a habit of it because he wanted to remind men that they were in the prescence of a woman...or he just enjoyed hitting them.

Given that they keep getting in trouble for their child slave labor...I mean, unsafe factories...errr...sweatshops in Bangladesh, Cambodia, and so on—they can shove it. Rather than fix the problems, they pay lip service and wait for our attention to get sidetracked elsewhere.

I was goth—none of those rules were an issue for me, but everyone thought I was going to start biting people and sucking their blood. Fear over adoration people!!

I was in the gym when I saw the news...this was my exact reaction (except on an elliptical trainer).

My Great Granny turned 101 in May. Unfortunately, she has not been happy for at least a decade because she has been chair/bed-ridden and needs a constant caretaker. A couple years ago she ranted about why God hasn’t taken her, but she seems to be in better spirits now.

My puppy-mill rexcue Pomeranian will wag her tail and exitedly bark when I reach out with both hands like I am about to strangle my brother (even if his back is turned). She will sit silent if he acts like he is about to strangle me. I decided to attach my Bow-lingual to her and see what she may be saying...

I went with this until my Dad squished a spider...and we watched in horror as hundreds of baby spiders started evacuating the mother site.

This makes me recall a similar discussion with a friend about “super plus maximum power” type tampons before. I described how it felt to pull out an almost dry huge tampon—and he went pale from the thought.

If a male is so squeamish that he cannot stand the sight of a tampon or maxi pad, I will make every effort to educate and offend that male until he is indifferent. Yes, I have thrown wrapped tampons/pads at men and shoved them into their pockets/shorts.

It is okay to quit as soon as you see red flags that mean trouble. Also, discuss kids much earlier in the relationship than when he is asking about marriage.

Don’t try this if you are in the Air Force. Put your weird into your work and next thing you know, the higher ups will be shoving you back into the box for not being like everyone else.

My brother lives with me and we have this exact problem too. I asked him to consider getting rid of two huge bags of hockey equipment and by his reaction, one would think he played hockey every danged day instead of over a decade ago. He bought 2 sewing machines because he took one sewing class at Jo-Ann...and both…

Crest Pro-Health can suck it because it turns my teeth dark brown. Seriously, it was so bad that I did not even smile for fear of showing my dark brown teeth.

Crest Pro-Health can suck it because it turns my teeth dark brown. Seriously, it was so bad that I did not even…

A good friend sent me flowers on Valentine’s day because he knew I broke up with my boyfriend weeks before and genuinely thought I would appreciate them.

Ditto.

Anything edible of vegetable origin gets thrown into my blender for my daily green smoothie. My dogs love all the vegetables too, but they are a bit of an anomaly (most dogs don’t seem to enjoy kale, raw collards, or broccoli stalks like mine do).

..or a disabled veteran. My legs/ankles/feet are wrecked to the point that I can typically only wear shoes with a wide/flat base with custom-made orthotic insoles. Hiking shoes and sneakers are my pals.

...yeah, the last few guys I dated owned no tools and did not know how to operate a firearm. I flat out asked each of them, “what kind of man are you?”