I think instead of "Wife Swap" there should be a "Star Swap" - where a c-list starlet trades places with a normal person.

She gets to have anaesthesiologist to glue on a veneer? Maybe she should have looked into Gwyneth Paltrow as a life coach.

Be nice to my pretend boyfriend! (who looks like my IRL husband!)

A Sayid & Jin sandwich ... Sawyer can be there too...

I hate to ask this - but how does someone over 6 feet tall hang herself on a doorknob?

You Don't Know Jacques is the best greige I've ever found ...

FINAL FOUR: Vicodin, Weed, Vodka, Champagne

My condolences ... we had to put down my 9 year old Pembroke 2 weeks ago. It was the hardest decision I ever had to make.

OMG - so I haven't finished watching... is this a Twinings Tea ad? Is this a sponsored post? Maybe co-op'd with Sony?

You know, I don't trust these instagrammy/filtered/upworthy feel-good stories with good looking people and sappy music.

Titled: How I Met Your Father?

I've seen maybe 20 - 30 episodes, off and on so not really invested. But, I'm of the opinion if the show ends with the mom being gone and the father telling stories (episodes) about how it came to be that they met, than that is a masterful work of writing for the long con.

delete

He's only 44. Damn, youngins'!
Most men peak mid 40s... just you wait.

It's like his suit was made out of flannelly fleece... no shoulders pads either ala Fallon.

I think he would be the best wedding guest ever!

We should wait for this...

I do this with every single picture of me I post to the internet. Insecure? Hell yeah!

I couldn't even make out the edges of it...

I dream of having shelf boobs!