Here’s the bottom line:

Haha, I know. Because Jennifer should be in the kitchen, barefoot and forcibly pregnant.

I have commented so many times on how awesome the GOP debates are going to be... And this .gif perfectly displays my emotions toward it.

I got my dog with an ex, and at first I was all “whatever, we just got this dog for her...” And then I’d be at home watching tv when she was gone or reading news, and I always kinda thought to myself, and suddenly I started to talking to her (my dog- Ruca) and she would do the head tilt, and scrunch up her forehead…

Well, Jia. This makes it official. You're my new favorite Jezebel writer. Carry on.

For me it's my dog. :-)

(No, it was a joke.) (But was it?) (Yes.) (Are you sure?) (No.) (Well?) (Stop it.)

Please wish that my girl T-Swift and that douchebag never break up, pleeeaasseee?

SSSHHHHHH!

Thanks, Donald! And we, the American people, will happily keep the substantial deposit for your Presidential run.

Look with the correct lighting, dramatic Muisc, and maybe a camera pan - Ben will make this make this into an Oscar winning performance.

I think it was more about seeing if he sufficiently changes the lyrics to his new hit song: “... Just tell your mom it’s Katie”

I'm pretty sure there's another way to handle a mentally ill person, aside from with a firearm.

Nevermind the question of pain killers being the pretty much go to drug in hockey. Wasn’t there a high profile Report a couple years ago about hockey players being on all kinda of pain killers all the time and shit? I think the crux was retired players being addicted and it ruining their lives...

NEEDS MORE STARS.

Jesse Watters—who looks like the result of a shameful one night stand between a Brooks Brothers suit and a copy of Atlas Shrugged

What a tremendous list of assholes.

Lol, dude I've been commenting here for years. And for some reason Jezebel just won't follow me. I think you just have to get first comment a lot and then why do it. Gawker went through and hit all the regulars it looks like...

God Olivia Munn is so hot.

Something, something, why am I still in the Greys on only this gawker site and Jezebel. Wtf.