So frustrating. I consider myself a true animal lover; seeing a puppy abused makes my blood boil like nothing else. However, I am an omnivore (as my teeth prove.) Seeing PETA do shit like this makes me think of the people I met when I was involved in Occupy who'd be like "Oh you're against income inequality? Then…

I'm from the South, and literally my mom's response to slavery is "well I read that most of them treated their slaves really well." Yeah mom, even if they did (which, not so much) owning another person is totally okay. Nothing wrong at all with that. Goddammit.

Lentils? Ughh, that was the WORST Barbra Streisand movie. What's Up Doc? was way way better.

Just remember, every time an ambulance pulls away from a nursing home with no lights flashing, there is one less Tea Party supporter in this world.

Nice.

I thought it was "Check This Shit Out."

You don't even wanna know what MapMyRuns keeps track of.

Skip needs to get off of his Hightower.

Maybe Jesus will come back and change these drunken bee attitudes.

I like that people like you exist. Makes it easier for me to get good cheap shit.

"Luke Warm," said John the Baptist after another retarded night at the Roman bathhouse.

Proof that a white person can have the work ethic of a Latino.

Damn, I was hoping it was George Wendt and Lena Dunham, to more accurately reflect the actual people who tend to get into this stuff.

On craigslist in Austin we found a $25 couch with a pull-out bed that looked new. A guy got it in a divorce and didn't want it anymore; it had spent 2 years in a "sitting room" no one ever used. It literally looked like it just came out of a furniture store. The mattress on the pull-out bed was even a Sealy. I think…

Compared to the National Championship? Yes, until there's a playoff all bowls are shitty except the main one.

Damn you're right. Must just be the National Championship games I'm thinking of. But hey, who cares about those when they can win a shitty bowl game instead.

In all fairness, she may have been blocking a fire exit.

Sadly he was supposed to attend a wedding at an SEC school. Unfortunately, no one from OSU shows up to those events.

Dr. Quinn, Jettison Woman.