Ironically (I think; will confirm with Alanis), the recent president to fit that description is Slick Willie. But your point stands.

Her shoes look especially tasty, like some sort of unholy alliance between allsorts and saltwater taffy (my two tooth-destroying favourites. My dentist likes them too)!

Of course it’s on TLC; I really should’ve guessed when I heard the name.

WhatisthisIcan’teven...

This should really have way more stars.

Did you screen for height, or was that just luck? Because even when our play is all-female, there’s always an outlier (usually Wilda The Diminutive), and people tend to just end up tagging in and out.

So I totally read that in a sing-song voice*, just in case you were wondering...like it kinda sounds like an invitation? You know, like so:

Yeah, I’ve not paid attention to the Niners for a looooong time now (I left the Bay Area well over a decade ago), and I had no idea they were gone. I didn’t know it was possible to run the team without that mobbed up jabroni and his helmet of hair overseeing everything. Didn’t he want to name the (thankfully shot…

They’re probably gonna put him in seg, because it’s a high-profile case of a cop whose crimes had a definite racial component, so everyone has been salivating, just waiting to get a piece of him. But, hey, paperwork accidents happen, right? *arthritic fingers even more crossed than usual*

No. Hell is too good for him, and it would mean he’s dead. Let the guards assigned to his inevitable suicide watch be diligent in removing all shoelaces from the vicinity, the better to keep him from death’s sweet release, and let him rot in the system with nobody ever visiting or even topping up his commissary…

Yes, yes. Your alligator tears sustain me as I continue to fight for sex workers’ rights, you piece of shit. Hope they dump you in gen pop, copper!

You guys are both taking the piss right now, yes? There’s not actually a show by that name, is there?

What the fuck? Am I ungreyed? But I’m terrible! Oh shit, am I fucking up?

What, like with were-power-forwards (*insert Beavis laugh*) and the like? And pylon pile-ons? And maybe a little ‘intent-to-blow’? Huh. Nope, that’s not interesting to me at all...nope, not at all...I have to leave now bye.

See? This is how the youth get corrupted. I mean, really? Pool sex?! Pool sex is terrible! Let’s get this filth banned, lest it lull another generation into thinking of pool-fucking as the pinnacle of pleasure. Otherwise, the mucous membranes of all who came (as if!) before will have been stripped in vain!

After a certain point, yes. But before that? Buckle up, cowboy, it’s gon’ be a wiiiild ride!

NO. Donald ducking is NEVER allowed!

Thank you! I usually stay out of these conversations, because I am way too sick of people trying to retroactively take away my agency. I have fucked, and I have been raped. I really do know the difference, guys.

Yeah, that’s why I* usually stay out of these conversations. I was sexually active at a very young age (12), and all my partners were older. Did they seduce me? Quite the opposite. I knew exactly what I wanted, and how to get it. Granted, I didn’t look nearly as young as I was (I ‘developed’ early — my hips are the…

Okay, can we stop spreading the wildly erroneous notion that people didn’t live past 35? It is simply, demonstrably untrue. Average life expectancy is just that: an average of all the numbers. So, if you’re living in an era with high neonatal/childhood mortality rates, obviously that average is coming way, way, down.…