Kyle got dragged away like Stan’s Dad.

What are the odds that the guy blowing the whistle trying to break up the scuffle is an ex-high school coach?

Worth it.

If he shits the bed? Have you had Chicago-style pizza?

Scary attempt to get to DC but everyone is alright

They’re getting the fuck out of the dugout since apparently that’s where the jackass is aiming with the bat flip.

They will have a tough battle in the first round when they face Egypt, Syria, Lebanon, Transjordan, and Iraq simultaneously.

Christ who actually pays for their splash mountain picture?

Pepperidge Farm remembers

Remember when gas/oil prices went up really high and flight prices skyrocketed because of it? And they crammed more seats on planes and charged us heavy fees for bags? Then fuel/oil prices dropped drastically and the flight prices never went down and fees never went away? Fuck everything about the airlines.

most exciting thing to happen in Evanston, Ill. since, well, ever.

As if 3/1 wasn’t already bad news for the Warriors.

“He’s got a concussion. Throw this white powder on him.”

How appropriate that this news was announced on 3-1

Does he still like turtles?

That freeze frame image is just like I remember from the Dukes of Hazard with the Balladeer saying something all country-fied right before going to commercial.

The 14 stunned birds were later quoted as saying “They were so good at the beginning of the season, what the fuck happened?!”

I actually have a solution. Birds could stop flying full speed into walls like idiots!

*Morans. This is Missouri we’re talking about.