John Mulaney has a bit in one of his standup specials where he says that he grew up before children were special, and I know what he means. I was often allowed to just sort of do as I pleased, and those days are over. However, I think we now live in a time in which only one’s own children have any value. Other…

I hate that I feel this way. I am the Daria Morgendorffer of my group text that is celebrating this.

They are for sure in full out tail spin war mode at the moment. And you’re right. Probably drunk.

fuck this worthless sack of human skin garbage

“Donald’s Screaming Tantrum.”

Trump tweeted: “ask Sally Yates, under oath, if she knows how classified information got into the newspapers soon after she explained it to W.H. Council (sic)” implying that Yates somehow knows how classified information was given to the press.

What i can’t wrap my head around is that it’s pretty easy to appear smart in the age of Google and Wikipedia. Like there’s a ton of arguments racist shitbags already use to claim the Civil War wasn’t about slavery. He could have used any of those but he just can’t even be bothered to try, because it literally doesn’t…

I still am hoping for an impeachment just so we can have the “YOU’RE FIRED!” headlines.

This man could not dishonor his office any more were he to drop his drawers and take a dump right on the Oval Office desk.

I am in Omaha, and also a lady who has gotten an abortion for a wanted pregnancy with severe abnormalities. I had to leave the state to do it, because this dude actively made Nebraska so hostile to abortions, I couldn’t get it here and had to go to MN.

The only party unity he wants is coalesced around his narrow economic views while jettisoning the issues that affect many/most of the democratic base most urgently. Thanks, but no thanks.

Yup. It’s like he doesn’t understand that having a kid when you’re not in a good place to support one can have the power to economically cripple a woman for years, if not her entire working life. Because children are time, money and energy sucks, paying and caring for one (especially if you don’t have family,…

For someone who is not a Democrat, Sanders spends a lot of time dictating how the party should run.

But I think you just can’t exclude people who disagree with us on one issue.

“on one issue”

Been waiting for the right opportunity to use this gem

I felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of racist drunkles’ voices wheezed out in terror and were suddenly silenced.

You probably don’t want to hang around here if that sort of thing upsets you.

When your entire statement is “poor word choice” that probably means your positive message was poorly conceived.

Seriously, I can’t even find the point where this speech went off the rails. It started off the rails. The train just dropped out of the sky on top of a schoolbus. No rails in sight.