For the love of god, somebody jingle some keys or get a laser pointer or something, anything.

Fuuuuuck

And follows up with “strong hands” like wtf? That’s straight up weird.

It’s so weird and aggressive and arrogant. What is with the yanking? I mean, it’s clearly a power play like you said, but it’s so transparent as to render it ineffective. All it does it make Trump look like an asshole.

That move where you grab and pull towards you is such cocky-douche wanna-be alpha shit. Drives me nuts when people do that and I immediately think you have a small dick when you do it.

melania be all like “omg stfu don’t remind him that we are here!”

You know, when I am meeting with members of our global team, I always take five minutes to Google customs of the country in question. It takes five literal minutes and it helps me avoid looking like a stupid idiot. And I’m just a finance scrub. I’m not the president, and I put more effort into fostering…

Yes, but they were in AMERICA. In America, we clamp down on your hand like a vice, stare directly into your eyes as a display of dominance and shake until a little bit of poop falls out.

Jesus Christ. One tiny upshot to this whole national embarrassment is that I now know, without a doubt, that I am not nearly as socially awkward and embarrassing as I thought I was.

Isn’t shit like this supposed to be what he’s good at? How did this ignoramus get where he is? Honestly, how the fuck did anybody get taken in by this transparently lame grifter?

He’s not actually a successful businessman.

Bullshit, it was the same childish power play with Gorsuch. Did you see that shit?

JK. Food stamps will not be available. Unless you are chosen as tribute in your local Hunger Games. In which case, you might win! Or you might die. Either way, you won’t have to worry about food anymore.

So what’s one way to combat this clusterfuck? Run for freakin’ school board. In a lot of districts, school board seats aren’t exactly high on the list of prestigious political positions, so a “common person” actually still has a decent chance of getting on the ticket and even winning. Don’t have the time or energy for…

Betsy “DeVoid of any Rational Thinking” DeVos is now 10th in line of succession for the Presidency of the US, is in charge of making sure our nation’s children learn that the Earth is 6,000 years old, and that cavemen lived with Dinosaurs. What the actual fuck.

EDIT: Thank you Mike Pence. It’s a miracle to see you can…

Not every nominee was unqualified. I don’t like their positions in many cases, but they’re Republicans so that’s to be expected. I’m okay with Mattis and Chao getting votes, they’re qualified for their posts.

She was confirmed just as I finished composing* the rant I was going to phone in to one of my senators’ state offices, and I am super-frustrated and disappointed in myself for not thinking to do this before it was too late. :(

Look at the bright side, With the voucher you will receive you can pay yourself as a teacher! That is the true end game for the voucher system.

For the life of me I cannot figure out where she got her support....

What a strange and wholly unconnected set of events!