How did you know my birthday plans?!

I still use “Fear is the Mind killer” when I ski. it’s a useful crutch for when common sense fails me.

I was about to say isn’t he still a young man? He looks older than I do, and I’m 53.

It was nice of you to honor Claw’s request.

As a lifelong Mets fan and season ticket holder, I’m just happy he wasn’t behind the plate. I mean, have you ever seen him try to throw someone out?

If nothing else, it’s the one you deserve.

I genuinely been that bare feet on the seats is probably the least of your potential problems riding the subway.

I doubt they’ve ever said thank you, seeing how their faces are buried in the trough.

Whaddya mean, he’s been to Nebraska.

At least it happened to the Cowboys.

Don’t get me started on Bretton Woods, either. Or New Coke. It’s all a continuum.

Highlight of the season, you might say.

Pizza will be cold by then.

I am. It’s not.

Oh, we’re calling them flats now? When did that happen?

C-, Bills fans. C-.

I think this is brilliant and wish more woman-owned businesses did it.

I know, right? I mistakenly bought German blinker fluid, and man, All it wanted to do was invade other cars.

Don’t hate. That movie was a deeply penetrating and insightful examination of globalism and some other things that sounded better in my head.

it’s the gift that keeps on giving.