Laura, I gotta ask - why did you write this article if you have never seen the movies or read the books? Is there no one at Jezebel who could have actually given an informed opinion?

Not gonna lie, I was pretty disappointed Jezebel didn't eviscerate Lady Gaga for featuring R Kelly on a track called "Do What You Want With My Body." URGH.

Hey, one of the cutest kittens I ever knew was called Wakame.

We must run in very different crowds.

I do feel that all religions are equally absurd, but some are more transparently fraudulent (like Scientology or early Mormonism).

Actually wait, I didn't see this first comment. Your idea that make-up consumes a woman's life is below the belt. Many women who wear make-up do all of the things you said, including traveling, becoming doctors, lawyers, writers, teachers, raising a family, performing community service, reading, etc. If you think all…

They also set the makeup gun to "whore" in the Photoshopped version.

I don't know. Do you really think it's feminist to tell woman to not do something? I agree, beautiful isn't the most important thing a woman can be, nor should it be her one and only goal in life. But for some women out there, make-up and fashion is like art to them. For others, it's simply a small way to feel…

Are you freaking out about how privileged Bieber is because TMZ reported that a (possibly drunk/high) girl passed out and they called 911? Can't speak for the rest of his life, of course, but this incident doesn't particularly sound like "that affluenza garbage writ large." Now, if they'd gone and dropped her off in a…

My boyfriend's sister has CP and can't drive, and she lives with his father in a rural area. His lottery-winning dream is just to get her a full time driver. No longer would she have to plan going to the coffee shop or shopping or meeting friends in advance, getting a ride or using the rural bus she has to request a…

You could buy a lot of lottery tickets with $550 mil.

Ok, weird. I attempted to insert the gif of Blanche Devereaux spritzing herself with water, and that's what it looked like in my preview, but instead it posted Carlton Banks doing his Carlton dance. Oookay, Kinja.

People need to slow their roll. This national Beyonce obsession is getting out of control.

That's awful. But also, lets pretend you were adopted. Who goes up to someone, who, at that point, the believe has adopted a child, and tells them horror stories about other adoptions?!

See, this is making me feel terrible for all the times I've asked this question for legitimate reasons. My two kids (infant and 2 years) go to a school where most of the parents are about 10 years older than me. I think they think I'M the nanny (I'm always ponytailed and always look like I just did a walk of shame)…

I don't think my best friend, THE GHOST OF SUSAN B. ANTHONY, would be very pleased with you, Swiffer.

The stories are horribly written and I don't doubt this guy is a self-pitying douche, but am I the only one who thinks that the shoes objectively are kind of interesting and it's kind of a cool idea? *runs*

hey, i'm an asian-american girl and i totally see where you're coming from! i grew up in hong kong, though, so i have a slightly different perspective on things. i didn't even realize how much asian men were emasculated in western media/society until i came to the U.S. for college.

Hey, welcome to the life of an Asian guy! If we're not that attractive, then we might as well be leper morlocks. If we're hot, then we're deemed good enough to be considered as attractive as average white guys.

And the rapist ' s dad told him girls said no when they meant yes.