I had a boyfriend in 2009 for a few months. That was nice. Then went 9 months without. Saw him again for two weeks. Then went 2 years without. Then had a week long fling with an ex. Then went 6 months without. Then had a drunken one night stand that wasn't worth the time it took me to shave my legs. That was…

Across The Universe, by Beth Revis. YA, and technically sci-fi, but it's more dystopian than sci-fi, it just takes place in space.

"Until their numbers grow to the point that they constitute their own voting bloc, I think we're safe."

" to Destroy Whole Foods"

I just met a young woman named Betsy yesterday. I couldn't help but think, "wow, there aren't many of you out there anymore."

It wasn't until I moved to Korea that I realized how dependent I was on brand loyalty. I just stood in the detergent isle staring. How on earth do you choose when you have no advertising influence from any of these products. It was bewildering. Also, Oreo is the one brand, that regardless of language it's…

This makes me sad. Because, where I live, this crazy shit is the norm. You mostly hear a bunch of "mmmhmm, mmmhmmm, amen"s when people say crazy shit like this. It's a constant struggle to not bash my head into my desk.

Sorry. They really should have a specified sarcasm font. Can we get Comic Sans on Kinja? I think that is the universal "I'm fucking with you" font.

What about Grāpples® ? Those things freak me out, but they smell like Grape Dimetapp, which I loved as a kid. Those have to be too GM'd to be vegan, right?

but Bees pollinate apple trees. So are apples actually vegan?

I don't know how many times I've tried to talk to relatives about how if the actual word isn't listed, as a stand alone word, then that's not the product you are getting.

Fuck Veet. I'm in my 30s and have just now mustered up enough lack of giving a shit to go out in public in a skirt/dress/shorts/ what-the-fuck-ever when my legs are hairy. Not stubbly, hairy.

"A blood moon is supernatural ominous spooky thing, say religious people."

Also, don't strangle your girlfriend.

This just made my day! Nothing like cheesy pizza revenge!

The former.

Holy moly. I think my ovaries just exploded. Chubby baby cheeks, father-son bonding, leg hugs. I can't handle the cuteness overload!

Got my dad to sign up a few months ago. He said he never thought he'd be so happy to sign up for healthcare. He's been living without it since he quit working a year ago. Not really "retired" so much as, unable to work due to health. He's been fighting with lawyers and disability insurance people for years now. …

Damn, the Dutch certainly do like to nap.

"Earth and Moon (yep, a planet-sized body hits the Earth and makes the Moon)."