See what I mean? Commenting going to shit. No mention at all of how far can I punt a football. F minus.

"Lord, why couldn't I have been born twenty years later, and been blessed with a larger penis?"

Still waiting for the Gizmodo feature on how it happened, the Lifehacker feature on how to make sure it doesn't happen to us, the Jezebel feature on how our culture allows males to feel that they can invade any women's privacy, the Gawker feature on how 4chan heard about the leaks, along with the TMZ call to get them…

I was watching my lousy Mets last night and the broadcast team did a "non scientific" study on how much time is wasted from both the pitcher stepping off and the batter stepping out of the box. They tallied the time at the end of the game and it came out to (don't remember the exact figure) somewhere between 20-30…

Great job, sir. God damn.

Send Tim Tebow to them... seriously

And just when things were going so well for the city of St. Louis.

Fuckin Ayn Rand would have been all over that shit.

You'd think with all the cap guys and SABRmetricians hanging around, SOMEONE would've been able to figure this out.

Trust me dude, I work for Walmart. The managers at my store are all very nice people, but the corporate higher-ups treat all of us like we're infected with Ebola.

The Cubs management? Incompetent to the point that it cost them a victory on the field?

+1908

The Cubs groundskeepers could have sure used the Invisible Hand of the Free Market to help them unroll that tarp.

To save money, the team has decided to end each season in September.

About damn time Philly. Its a shame the fucking fake boxer got one first.

Well what are YOU doing to stop the spread of American Sign Language?

It will be actually a few factors involved, mainly the moisture content of your cake and the efficiency of your freezer. Obviously if your freezer is almost empty and set to a very low temp, you will get a more rapid cooling, requiring less time.