The thing I like most about her is that her boss and mine are essentially the same awful person, which is why they hate each other, but she has no trouble telling her boss off. She is out of fucks to give. I can’t wait until I’m there.

I have a colleague who was a bond trader in the 80’s. She has a mouth like a long haul trucker, and she’s everything I want to be at 60.

It’s really unbelievable when you look back at the history of jobs as to what used to be possible - that’s why I love/hate that Old Economy Steve meme. I work in museums, and there are so many people (mostly men) in the early 20th century who rose from being the most basic of research assistants to museum director…

Yeah, her parents (mainly her mom) earned everything, through extreme hard work and rising from a secretary to an executive at a huge nationwide firm (back when it was still possible to do things like that). I don’t know any old money people! Or at least not as close friends - I have nothing in common with most of…

Because it’s not the language she wanted to take, and not the country she’d been dreaming about for years? Because her mother was being a control freak asshole for no good reason? Because as long as you get good grades your parents should let you study what you like, because that’s what normal, non-control freak…

I don’t envy my officemate’s family’s wealth at all. Like, her parents own 5 houses, but her mom has been fucking with her self esteem all her life, and stopped her from taking classes she would have liked in school (like French), because it wasn’t as practical as Spanish. Like, what??? The hell my parents would ever…

I don’t understand why more people don’t realize this - when people are awful to you, you can cut them off and declare them dead to you. You reap what you sow in this world, IMO. In my family, our family tree is kind of without branches (which sounds like that old Jeff Foxworthy joke that if your family tree doesn’t…

They are a thing. And when you combine them with a beard, it’s known as The Full Brooklyn.

I could definitely handle it emotionally - but not physically. I can’t even go to concerts in standing only venues anymore, because standing for even an hour is too painful. My plan involves wine, muscle relaxers, and my bathtub. My friends know they can raid my home for supplies if they promise to put a bullet in my…

Yup. I once brushed shoulders with a woman in an intersection (because she was walking diagonally across and bumping into everyone) And she rounded on me swinging her purse above her head and trying to hit me - and her gentleman friend was just standing there in stillness and silence. I sincerely hope he broke up with…

They really think they own everything up to the road! Oh but hey - it’s not my responsibility to fix the sidewalk! The town should do that.

We had drunk asshole Russian neighbors who were constantly fighting. One dragged his girlfriend by the feet down the hall once. We called the police at least every 2 weeks until they moved out. The last time, they decided to pretend they didn’t speak English. The cop said, ‘I’ve been here 10 times this year, I know…

Plus, unless you have the narrowest street in existence, you should barely have to come up on the sidewalk at all to turn around, let alone the driveway.

Why are homeowners so fucking crazy? I had a friend who bought a house, and when I visited the first time, her car was in front of her house instead of her driveway. And she said she kept it there so people wouldn’t park in front of her house. Excuse me - I thought one of the points of buying a house was guaranteed…

A neighbor once did this to me, but I wasn’t annoying. She was a raged filled crazy person, and everyone else on the floor thought so, too.

That sounds weird. I like baked oatmeal in the winter. Bake it on Sunday, let it sit in the fridge overnight, throw a slab in the microwave the next day. I get all my baked oatmeal recipes from Budget Bytes.

People pay way too much for those.

I used to work at an auction house. Once I was supervising the packing of some paintings into a crate, and saw a stainless steel bucket in the middle of the floor. I was all, WTF is this? And got complete attitude of, “Ermahgerd, that’s JEFF KOONS. HOW do you not KNOW that.” Because it’s a fucking bucket, asshole.

Hell yeah I would! Disclaimer - finished paying off $40K in student loans 3 years ago. From my art history BA and MA. Go ahead and laugh, but I love what I do and have never been unemployed in my field. I am not capable of doing anything else - except other humanities related things. I would be a miserable failure at…

I used to have a job where one guy (senior management - doubly stupid behavior) had dated so many guys at the office (pretty much every gay guy, and there were a lot) that I started calling him the company bicycle - because pretty much everyone had a ride. It was one of my proudest moments in life when that became his…