Thank god, or whatever forces there may be. This is the tiny ray of light I needed to feel like not all hope for our future is lost.

I cried this morning at work when I read that she had been evacuated. Then I went into the bathroom and sobbed in the stall because yesterday a tv journalist reported on a 5 year old child in Syria who was in surgery WITHOUT ANAESTHESIA. He was reciting verses of the Quran out loud to withstand the pain.

I just thought this would be a good time to remind everyone that Kristallnacht happened when, after a tide of rising antisemitism in Germany, a Polish Jew shot and killed a German diplomat.

Somebody definitely confiscated his phone until after the electoral vote is finished today. Wouldn’t want him to tweet out any more reminders about exactly how unpresidented he is, after all. 🙄

My coworkers and I would race them.

When I worked in a feminist sex shop, we frequently used them (and the vibrators) as imaginary microphones for singing along to Lauryn Hill and whatnot.

Don’t ask me how I know this, but those “fists” actually weigh quite a bit. Excellent choice!

***I love this story with one million Stars and Hearts***

Man with fake gun foiled by women with fake penises.

I’m also guessing they both brush their teeth before bed. That helps create more sexy times.

You know that scene from leaving Las Vegas where Nick Cage is dancing around the store while filling his shopping cart full of booze? That was me when I found out that I was allowed to buy more than 96 total ounces of beer at a time.

I still find it insane that you can buy liquor and wine in grocery stores (sort of, in those little “separate” sections) but not beer.

Raised evangelical here, with a super strict mom who wouldn’t let us watch movies that had any nudity or even the tamest of sex scenes in them.

The 11th commandment is thou shalt profit above all else.

Sex isn’t for enjoyment! It is for procreation and even then it is a sin!

I was in the checkout line at a Floridian Publix a few years ago and noticed a bunch of magazines had dividers blocking their covers. Now coming from Pennsylvania, a state that makes buying alcohol a Herculean Chore, I thought Florida was just as cool with pornography as it was with booze and sold it right beside…

I hate to tell evangelicals, but kids are pretty understanding to sex as long as you don’t keep them locked in an attic ala V.C. Andrews.

Chrissy Teigen - the bedtime ritual that keeps her marriage hot! She and her husband are sleeping with incredibly hot people? Can it possibly be more complicated than that?

The jesus freaks need to keep their damn hands off my #1 source for how to give a better blow job.

So, educating women about sex isn’t important? I mean, aside from the “Top 10 Tips to Turn Your Man On Like a Waxed Candle” articles, there are some pretty fascinating stuff in Cosmo (at times, I mean, let’s not get too crazy).