I feel like this is the blog post version of: "FINE. I redid it the way you wanted, but it was hard and I didn't like doing it."

This guy wants one!

Are there actually rocky planets that are more massive than Uranus? Because that is insane.

I know, fuck these guys, right? We should only be spending money on science that validates things we already know.

Don't use this. You don't want this. You don't want to know.

Right, but what about the guys from Top Gear?

Wait... Are you saying you didn't think he crapped in a box before?

Alternative ideas:

I can't believe I had to scroll all the way down here to find this. C'mon, people.

My thoughts exactly.

QED!

Phew! I was worried for a minute there. Good thing Newt Gingrich knows what's up! This man is a doctor.

That expression seems... familiar...

Nope. This guy:

You're thinking of the dad who hacked Donkey Kong so his daughter could play as Pauline. Adorable story:
http://www.wired.com/gamelife/2013/…

5/5 dogs agree!

Step 1: Change Siri's voice to male.
Step 2: Ask Siri to call you "Dave".
Step 3: Ask Siri to open an app or delete a reminder.
Step 4: Hilarity ensues.

Personally, this is my favorite everyday math shortcut: