I impersonated a runner once, until my mother told me to get the fuck off the dining room table.

The question asked about sports.

“That toughness comes in handy in a place like North Dakota. You see, up there, jamming your numb fingers against someone’s ice-cold helmet happens every practice. Getting decked on the cement-like dirt is just how a play ends.

In high school he had great speed but his coaches grew frustrated due to his Exodus 20:15 approach to base running.

Affirmed.

Given that Barbaro was maybe the unifying force of OG Deadspin, none of this is a surprise.

Dear SACSCOC,

Please review the attached 73 page letter. We will pass jurisdiction over you and recommend you remove the accreditation of the University of North Carolina as there is a lack of institutional control over their degree programs.

Sincerely,

The NCAA

As a B-more resident, that’s just what it tastes like fresh. Have absolutely nothing else to argue with in this article or comment section

Once golf starts using trained birds to drop the balls into the hole, then you can start comparing it to dressage.

You’re not wrong about Ray Lewis. He’s definitely a cut above the rest.

Italian Manager: These conditions are terrible!!!

I WAS HOPING TO SEE PULISIC TODAY

You had to ruin a good moment didn’t you?

Pretty sure that no one was on your lawn, sir.

But on the flip side, I would show up to more office meetings if that kinda shit was gonna happen.

“Methodology flawed; why are we discussing this?”

-Prof. A. Iverson, University of Pennsylvania, Reader for original paper

“It seems that Gladwell didn’t really understand what he was talking about.”

I don’t want to jump to any conclusions here...but maybe it’s about time we formed a human chain around Vin Scully, just as a precaution.

Given the commentariat’s proclivity for pun jobs, all future posted highlights should be in Punjabi.