The problem, according to Principal Schmidt, was that the paint they used was non-removable. "It was a truly regrettable decision that they used this paint. Once they went with the black, there was no going back."

"There was nothing racial about it," says Schmidt. "They didn't have any other intention than to just try to intimidate the underclassman by wearing blackface," she continued. "It's okay, I'm *married* to a guy who wears blackface," she finished.

I heard some of them were having difficulties finding a telegraph operator.

But more importantly we just discovered that Kawhi Leonard is an Immortal awaiting the time of the Gathering.

I mean, to be fair, most of the original Patriots did too.

Shouldn't the Eagles' PR staff have some sort of policy against their players following other teams?

False equivalence and knee-jerk contrarianism.

So no beer, they have to move the tournament to the winter when all the European leagues are still going on, you might go to jail if you're gay, and they are basically using slave labor to build stadiums which will have no purpose after the tournament. FIFA makes the NFL look like Amnesty International.

If one of these asshats is your friend, you're probably pretty shitty too.

They just got carried away because they're so concerned about ethics in journalism.

Chloe apparently tweeted a photo of a cheese grater (which was later deleted) before the game, because Packers fans are Cheeseheads, get it?

Don't forget, my children aren't immune either.

But we were never gonna survive unless Seal went a little crazy.

What would Qatar have to do to lose the World Cup at this point?

New Orleans has objected, asserting that it's unreasonable to expect fans going abroad for one game to learn a second language.

"If this flag offends you you need a history lesson."

Parents became suspicious of Sandau's views when he started awarding gold stars to the team's worst, least coordinated players.

"The Phillies Way" by Ruin Tomorrow or "How I Stopped Worrying About the Salary Cap, the Farm System, My Reputation, the Fans, Common Sense, Competitiveness and Learned to Love Seeing My Name in Print."

Rikk became so sweaty and flustered when he spotted his name on the top of the notecard and it dawned on him that he's been spelling Rick wrong for 43 years.

"As World Series MVP, Chevy would like to award you with a VAN down by the RIVER!"