I’ve never done nukazuke, but I have microwaved a zucchini. Ok, I’ll show myself out. 

I don’t think so. 

Given that every video I’ve watched for the last two weeks has been preceded by a commercial for a conspiracy theory newspaper, I’m wondering if these measure will extend to their own ad sales department.

This has been by far the highlight of quarantine. I have bartered a paint brush a neighbor needed for her kid’s art project for a stick of butter I needed for banana nut bread. I took some of that banana nut bread to another neighbor who had bought a 25 lb. bag of flour and decided to learn how to make tortillas which…

Oh sure, I see this ten minutes after placing my $140 bar-restocking liquor delivery.  

Seeing the State reunite for Porcupine Racetrack went down as grooves as $240 worth of pudding. Realizing it was for the 25th anniversary hurts worse than a pair of ill-fitting Adidams. 

Oh look who’s flexing about losing his virginity to a redhead!

It’s not so much the Winston Churchill martini you reference as it is a Luis Buñuel.

The ones I’ve made the last two weeks have made more than I can eat before it would go stale (your mileage may vary) so I’ve wrapped up half and left them on neighbors’ doorsteps. In reciprocity I’ve received a pound of butter, five pounds of sugar, homemade tortillas, and two hand-sewn masks. It’s been amazing.…

The contrast highlights how awful American “reality” shows are. In the BBC version he was allowed to have empathy, helped the restauranteurs with enthusiasm, common sense, and at the most extreme end tough love (perhaps my favorite was asking the owner, what do you make well? Gravy? Ok, you’re a gravy restaurant now,…

I used to love Pete’s Pond! I would set my alarm for Botswana sunset local time. 

https://yarn.co/yarn-clip/b48e3c47-2426-439d-8023-6820caa00ce0

I read it almost yearly, but I realize now I’m overdue. 

So do Santiago and Manolin in Old Man and the Sea. 

I don’t have a dog in this fight, but I would like to offer this tweet from former G/O employee and Curmudgeonly Jew Emeritus, David Roth:

Iron Maiden? Why not

Bonus, if you stock up on sweetened condensed milk, you can make super easy, delicious caramel sauce in your instapot.

Look at you being all optimistic any of us are living to retirement age. 

“And now I have, for all practical purposes, infinite time to watch an infinite amount of awesome tv.”