Now you can text while jerking two guys off

Well at least now we know what next year's models may look like

Too bad he couldn't engineer it to work with a decent phone amirite

You just have to properly lube the hole. Seriously, squirt some lock lubricant into the hole and it won't matter how skinny your hilt is.

The good news is that aside from the mortal sin of non-offset thumbsticks (haters come at me),

I have to call bullshit here. The average tab on Firefox and Chrome use a total of 50,000k. What is that about 50mb? lets just say you open up 50 tabs thats 2.5 gigs of ram on that alone. if you open 250 thats 12.5 gigs of ram on tabs. I am sure you have a powerful machine, and if you are power user then you are a…

I'm pretty sure you're using the internet wrong.

Russian scientists are hot at the scene of the hole right now.

That's a common injury in that area. Millions of Brazilians were also severely butthurt recently.

"If you want to die in Australia" is more like it.

Bionicle

"Non-returning boomerangs have been used for at least 20,000-30,000 years…"

Maybe the son is a Zelda fan!

If all it takes is one, why isn't everyone terrified of women?

2031

cant ever not post

I know someone who wouldn't mind...

Sarlacc is covered. I'll do graboids.

With this printer you need a flat, steady surface. If you're on the road these can be hard to come by.

TURN YOUR GODDAMN PHONE.