Eh, Kermit can totally do better than Piggy.

The gourmet burger place near me has the option to ‘go dirty’ by adding a slice of processed cheese (rather than extra-mature cheddar or whatever it is they normally use), so they too have embraced your cheese world-view.

More like when people on the train ask when the baby is due and then give you a burrito.

“They had time beforehand to get touched up” - unfortunate choice of words, there...

Principal dancer, maybe?

Whose parents don’t notice that their very very pregnant daughter didn’t turn up?

I remember reading an interview with Matt Damon where he said his stepdaughter wouldn’t sleep when they stayed somewhere without air conditioning, and he and his wife looked at one another and were like ‘Whoa! What have we done? She’s never stayed anywhere without air conditioning, so she doesn’t understand how much…

Get a curved-tip plastic syringe (Google ‘monoject 412’) and use that. Same principle but much less pressure, and I find it does the job nicely.

What?! What ‘chances’? A tattoo done by a competent practitioner in a western country is no riskier in terms of HIV/hepatitis than, I dunno, a trip to the dentist. By which I mean, it’s definitively not risky at all because all the equipment is sterilised and all the necessary precautions taken. Do you actually…

I would imagine the other social factors involved would make those statistics hard to come by, though? Like, for example, I live in the UK, where abortion is readily available (and people are generally OK with the idea; there’s not so many people with strong religious objections as in the US); and where there’s a…

Show me the adoption agency that can guarantee a family to anyone who walks through the door, and I’ll show you liars and charlatans, or worse. Adoption exists to further the interests of children without families, and some people aren’t going to be the right family for the children needing one. And some lovely and…

Sir or Madam, please have all the stars.

Leaving aside the fact that a child is a person who becomes a member of your family, not a thing you ‘get’, neither of those statistics is accurate. Adoption is expensive and by no means a guaranteed path to a family, while most people’s IVF odds are well above 10% per cycle. (Hell, mine are like 25-30%, even with my…

It’s actually a really nice frock, too - the blessing service one, anyway.

Chancellors don’t really do anything except put on robes and gladhand at events like graduation, though. The appointment of a Chancellor will often be close to stunt hiring - someone notable or famous in their field (or just famous, in some cases) to be a public figurehead. The Vice-Chancellor is the person with real…

My casting issues with this film are that everyone looks about twelve and they all seem really boring.

And what’s going on with the candlesticks?

Wow. Just wow.

Yeah... I’ve had quite a few transvaginal ultrasounds, and that ain’t never been a thing.

I was just coming to say the same thing (andask what the hell gravy juice was! Is that like a longer way of saying ‘gravy’ or does it have some other meaning?)