Shaq thinks she should have asked for weekly paychecks so that ESPN wouldn’t think she was making so much.

Let’s not be too quick to judge Ms. DeVos. Maybe her plan was to meet with three people, then each of those people would meet with three more people, and so on and so on.

POTUS has a podcast?

When finally reached for comment, Wendy’s was notably frosty.

Was it at Jefferson? I used to date someone who worked in the cafe and I’d run into Russell a lot when I went to pick her up. One time, I was reading a golf magazine off the rack, waiting for her shift to be over, and Bill comes up to me, shakes my hand (his hands are gigantic; I’m 6'5" and his fingers felt like they…

The only example I can even think of of someone being “chosen” for one of our squads in Winter Olympics as opposed to just automatically qualifying through having the best results is figure skating, where in 2014 they took a photogenic white girl who finished 4th at nationals instead of the non-photogenic…

While doing penance in summer school 1969 I was constrained by the rule that only let you miss TWO days of summer session. Having already lost one with feeling crappy, I was up against losing two to attend the 1969 Watkins Glen Can-Am/six hour FIA race. I needed to pass the classes but, hey the GLEN!!! Solution? Use…

I’d hand the whole organisation over to a panel of former gymnasts, like Aly Raisman. They’re about the only people who could regain everyone’s trust.

Scams you need not avoid, ranked:

“You’re tall, what position do you play?”

Let it be known, I always stand for the flag. After the 5th time a yellow flag is thrown during the game I stand up and walk outside to do something else.

Number of reasons why <redacted> stopped watching the NFL (And in no way am I excusing the NCAA and the hypocrisy of collegiate athletics, this is about why I stopped NFL.)

Stat comparison:

Just want to say thank you for all your work, especially your incredible investigative pieces year after year. Deadspin is a great place for dick jokes and making fun of Austin Rivers, but for me, no author’s byline here commands as much attention as yours.

This is the worst conversation ever to appear on the internet.

Keith Markovich and Mike Cernovich are the Dylan McDermott / Dermot Mulroney of close set eyes shitgibbons.

yes

I’m 33 and my highlights would be the interesting ways my children have vomited, urinated, drooled, sneezed and defecated on me.