Sepp Blatter is so multicultural that he whistles "Spanish Harlem" in Quebecois.

New Orleans Saints Injury Report:

It's not Old El Paso Dinner?

Town Crier: We are gathered here today to witness the stoning of one George Atkins! Mr. Atkins stands accused of being a blubbering idiot — in the past two weeks alone he wasted the remains of seventeen whales! How do you plead?

A politically active ESPN is why we eventually elect President Camacho.

The surgeon can tell A-Rod whatever he wants, but determining if someone is ready to play baseball for the Yankees again is completely in the realm of the team doctors. The surgeon's opinion certainly shouldn't be discounted, but it's not up to him to decide. I'm absolutely sure the team doctors/trainers have the…

I wasn't 100% sold on the new site design, but this goes a long way. This is a fantastic feature!