First league investigation of improperly deflated balls that didn't involve PED use.

You guys are losing your touch. It took 5 whole minutes before a Penn St. apologist came here screaming "HE REPORTED IT TO THE AUTHORITIES!"

The decision to vacate the wins was nearly two and a half years old, so it comes as no surprise that Penn State completely fucked it.

"Football was more important to them than saving children."

I feel really positive for all the Penn State alumni who will interpret this move as a validation of what they've claimed all along: That their hero was not the driver of a nefarious coverup, but was simply too much of a stupid pants-shitting old dullard to put the pieces together, realize what was going on, and take…

Truly today is a great victory for anyone who's ever assisted in the cover-up for a chronic sexual predator.

Treadmill: COME ON DOWN!!

Impressed with their ability to enrich themselves on the backs of others and to exploit a professional hockey player relentlessly, Gary Bettman has offered the Johnsons an expansion franchise.

Smart, but risky move by Morton. Breaking a rib sucks, but it's a hell of a lot better than having to watch the Leafs for another 55 minutes.

The bike's "Never Forget 12/7" sticker might explain it.

"Sorry, I thought you were black."

"we use to bullseye wamprats in my F-16 back home, and they're not much bigger than 2 meters"

I heard an alternate version:

Q: How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

It's pretty telling how much spin was placed in such a short paragraph ... "returned to argue with us," "lecture us," "insisted on creating a scene," pleaded our case," "scoured the Flight Attendants' Handbook," "my husband pleaded with her," "sobbing," "zero compassion." Somehow, I get the feeling she's only telling…

*jezebel

.....so the Daily Mail is basically Gawker now?

But hey, so long as they protect us from the dangers of Marijuana, am I right guys?

This reminds me of a joke: