ctrl-f

The Patriots were just making sure they got the ball at the start of double overtime.

My birthday is in the third week of March, so growing up it was usually the week before spring break, and in college it was on spring break. I think it worked out pretty well.

My birthday is the first week of March and I think it’s just about perfect. Summer and fall are nice, but there’s plenty to do — sports, enjoy the outdoors, take trips. You know what there is to do in the first week of March, particularly in Minnesota? Drink to numb the existential malaise of the fifth straight month…

Did you mean January 1st? Or is there a whole swath of people that go out drinking on New Years Day that I don’t know about?

Jaguars GM Dave Caldwell said that he thought Blackmon’s career was likely over.

“Great, now we’re both suspended!”

He used to play fallout, till he took a Sonata to the knee.

Does this mean his Luck level is really low (hit by a car indoors) or really high (still alive!)?

What makes a short train

Man...Dwight Howard is gonna be super bummed when his Google Alert for “Dwight Howard+Very Funny” comes up.
Good.

Mmmmm lemme think.

One political party thinks that adherents of the world’s 2nd Largest religion are essentially all terrorists, and have suggested closing their places of worship, denying them entry into the nation, and creating lists of all adherents.

I once saw Drake, Justin Bieber and Rob Ford sitting within 50 ft. of each other at a Raptors game.

He’s a black belt in Hulk Smash.

His mother and father have trained him since birth in the ancient art of being twice as fucking large as every other man. It's a time tested technique that's known to trump all other disciplines

He’s trained in the art of shrugging off your attacks as he calmly snaps your bones like if he were preparing kindling for a camp fire.

Hope I’m not the only one who didn’t come anywhere close to getting this joke

What a disgusting and ill-informed comment!

Before anyone breaks out the old “if only they had guns” trope, let me remind you: Texas is a stupidly shaped cesspool that should be punted into the sun.

Not a hockey fan but I wanted to say the length and the presentation of this video is amazing. I wish all of the sports would compile videos like this when explaining rules violations/suspensions/etc.