Yeah, everytime I think “I want to be skinny!” and then I see stuff like this I’m like, nah it’s cool I’ll buy new pants.

Nope, I’m sorry, this T.Swift move is the perfect “bitch, please.”

TIL wearing revealing clothing as a 19 year old woman makes you “lost”.

Seriously, GTFO of here with your stupid bullshit. She’s a young woman doing what 90% of young women do at her age, she just happens to also be famous.

I hold V.C. Andrews’ estate personally responsible for all non-consent-related fantasies in women over the age of 25. Those legions of horny half-brothers never took no for an answer.

They’re really going all out for Top Gun 2.

I have never liked Amy’s standup because I’m not into “edgy, sextimes!” style comics - you’re right, it’s lazy. But Inside Amy Schumer is fucking hilarious and smart and crazy. I like her better working on a team doing sketch comedy. (The 12 Angry Men parody - my god.)

You have done me a service, good madam.

SOMEONE PLEASE HELP WHAT IS HAPPENING

It was so terrible as a sentence that even had it been shade it would still be a violation of the English language. So. There’s that.

I hate oral, sue me. (Just receiving, I will happily give.)

Sitting in a tub of ice to combat my hot flashes is infinitely preferable to the cold horror of finding Jake Tapper’s nothing face attractive.

Honestly this isn’t that far from what I see the college girls wearing in my local coffee shop. Sometimes I kind of want to be like “you know your whole bra is out, right?” but I know they know.

Yeah if we’re going to pick a Meghan Trainor song to play in hell it’s definitely Dear Future Husband. There’s no contest.

Haha oh my god, I lost it at him wanting to hang out with her and her new man. MY LIFE.

I don’t doubt he’s texting her. Nothing like your ex’s break up with the person he dated after you to guarantee some sadpants texts in your inbox. I’m sure Jen is just doing what we all do with the “yeah sorry to hear that” and then politely dodging the subtle insinuations they should hang and talk.

Lindy West has a passage in her book about Sir Hiss as an aside on her take about fat animated characters, and she makes a comment about Kluck from Robin Hood “being a four hundred pound chicken, she wasn’t afraid to throw down in a fight with a lion and a gay snake.” And I spat Coke everywhere, because yes of course…

TLC’s stuff, in stark contrast to most of the 90s music I adored, still holds up today. Who doesn’t car-dance to No Scrubs? Monsters, that’s who.

I am a white person, and I understood but didn’t love this word until I got to the part of the article that said “the w-word” and I rolled my eyes back into my head. I increasingly feel like I’m 13 and my fellow white people are my mother; I spend all my time like STOP IT YOU’RE EMBARRASSING ME.

No, but now that you mention it, I would read the fuck out of your comments on mommy blogs.

Yes, this is very clearly the ever-so-Canadian “trying desperately not to laugh to avoid offending everyone”.