In my mind, Lance Berkman and Larry Walker share a double-wide decorated solely with a rotary phone that only takes calls from the HOF.

he only played 15 years?

Start with the fast & furious gearbox, proceed from there.

1980's

Ranch dressing, because white people.

he can't be. he only roots for the teams that win championships.

I still wish I had gotten one of the Uecker Milwaukee Admirals Jerseys.

It's like chef boyardee had an abortion.

What was intended to be a ribbing of the meatball fans, became embraced by the same fans. You still hear people say "Da Bears" and a little part of me dies every time.

KILL IT WITH FIRE!!!!

ATS-V Wagon!

"Iowegians?"

Suzy Kolber tries every night.

START MCCOWN, BRO!!!!

Really, dissecting "Omaha?"

Cubs fans know there was nothing even slightly amusing about Mr. Fukodome.

The list of Chicago bands better than Alkaline Trio is long.

Because New Jersey

Lettuce is for suckers.