Oh, thanks—I’ve been looking for something to decorate my desk with at work. Bone Clones Part No. BC-288-SET (set of 12 fetal skulls) looks just perfect! Great conversation starter, too.

Here’s what I don’t get, I understand greed and all that, but the lives of employees are literally more valuable than whatever you can fit into that safe.

Candidate’s kids getting arrested for dumb things is sort of a tricky question

...this amendment “is really a loophole for the abortion industry.It allows someone who’s going to profit from abortion to get the waiting period waived.”

I felt so mortified I turned my game off immediately.

“We plan to show America who these authors are use our show to intimidate these authors, because discussion of health topics should be free of intimidation.”

Don’t pack the bowl so tightly! It burns better when it’s loose (and you’ll waste less).

Sometimes, problems just take care of themselves.

I just questioned if it was going to include homophobic or misogynistic rants. She unfriended me.

be yourself in camouflage

[Funeral home] hires pseudo actors that pretend and con their way into your pocket books and sign debt loads that will give them a steak dinner and a night’s outing at some gay bar. Understand?

I gave your opinion some weight until the Toblerone comment. Now we're enemies.

Your story has the makings of a very powerful book. It could help people.

...my idiot GM had not only apologized to her but SAT the woman and her table at a reserved table then proceeded to berate me for letting her make a scene.

No.

Why is it always the chubby, subaverage-looking dudes who act like they’re familiar with sex when we all know the truth?

Lemonades. Lemonades are the new best Girl Scout Cookie. Thin Mints are a close second due to not enough mintiness.

Nice story! I'm in the "embarrassingly teary-eyed at work" camp on this one.

Because many (or most?) people tend not to think, but rather parrot things they’ve heard others say. They’ve heard that books are good, and that staring at a screen all day is bad.

Apparently Ann Coulter has a thing for rappers with big, stylish sunglasses.