He usually spells his name with a silent "P"

Bachelorette parties will forever have a special place in my heart. The first time I ever went to a real club (alone and with a male friend), this guy kept creeping over and grinding on me, uninvited. I wasn't yet the elbow-throwing feminist menace I am today, so I didn't know what to do other than sort of awkwardly…

Time! Just time! You will be fine as long as you know that it will pass. It is difficult to get over now but just keep remembering that IT WILL PASS GIVEN SOME TIME.

I'd like to believe that if normal clothing is prompting a "crushing" sensation for anyone of any ball-having status, perhaps some clothing (and life) choices need to be reevaluated...

See, if it were me, I'd roll around in that shit and work it.

Because my earlier reply did not have the advantage of verbosity or actually having read the completely fucking absurd article, and was merely going off of the completely fucking absurd title, I am writing a second response that will hopefully illuminate why, for those wondering, this article is so terrible, despite…

YOU wouldn't. The millions who don't use or want a wallet cover may want this. Different tastes and needs... Who would have thought it...?

I am in a listicle mood today, so:

Also makes a great chew toy.

There's nothing wrong with her body, that's how a 47 year old body looks, if you're lucky and have very, very good genes. Why people should continue the myth that beautiful = young I don't know. Because as a species our window of youth is relatively small, and we'll be old far longer than young. That's a long time to…

This is a prime example of the dangers of brakes on cars.

Not possible on California roads. Any follow space is instantly filled by a BMW.

I'm sorry, you work for a company that repossessed a copy of Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul? What were the payments like that the customer couldn't keep up?

I usually get same or next day delivery with Amazon Prime. It's basically ruined every other company for me.

I usually get same or next day delivery with Amazon Prime. It's basically ruined every other company for me.

"And here is our garden."

I work with people AALLLLLLLLL day. I have a finely developed appreciation for people who take no shit from those people and a keen respect for management that doesn't throw itself into every mud puddle so the customer can walk all over them and their staff. The customer isn't always right. Sometimes the customer is a…

Academy of Model Aeronautics. It's common practice for victims of murder attempts to seek comfort in model aviation, and the promotion of model aviation as a recognized sport. Life doesn't get more raw than in model aviation.

I love tiny old people. He's like a 70 year old man in a six year old's body.

ON A CRACKER!

Are you sure this isn't better for a Juggalo Gathering?