Medieval fantasy =/= Skyrim rip off.

EA, so no

what other genders would you like?

they're developing a system, called The Keep (not sure if it'll be an app or website or what) where you can basically tick a bunch of boxes corresponding to choices and plot flags from the first 2 games and DLCs, and then import that into DA:I

my impression, pieced together from a few things they've said, and tied into your Elder Scrolls comparison, is that their going for a situation like you'd have Cyrodil as one region, but hit a loading screen when you crossed the border in to Skyrim. So, not a bunch of small zones, but a handful of really big ones.

I'd imagine so, as RPGs that favor player-character customization will generally give you a means of... Customizing the player-character.

well they've gone on record as saying that one of the smallest regions (zones, as you say) in DA:I is geographically larger than the entirety of DA2. So there's that.

I wouldn't say know to a toilet with a bad ass Blood Dragon on it

that's fair enough, and I do remember those days (I literally learned how to read on NES game manuals so I could play with my dad). I remember battle toads and ninja gaiden and, later, super Star Wars. So I know what target the From Software games are aiming at, and I respect it. But my tastes tend towards story first…

I feel like my eyes just that's the best sex of their lives. Like a spiritually uplifting, loving yet thorough fucking. My retinas are now men.

I've not seen that word in an eon.

no real children were harmed in the production of this game. In fact, I bet a few were born during it's creation, so we're good

I'm curious as to what the first 9 games + awful spin-offs were then

well Armageddon is already "fixed." Both in that it everyone dying was retconned away, and in that all the awful story lines leading up to it were negated without being outright ignored. And it seems like they introducing new characters instead of just re-retconing people they just killed back to life. Except for…

I'm curious, and this is low snark, if you've actually played MK9? For me, it dethroned Ultimate MK3 as my favorite.

maybe give both teams the objective of keeping the hostage alive?

Not an elephant! A Michael Baylephant!

maybe they're from somewhere that Hindi is spoken?

Read that as car blowing up in your feces. Not a good look.

I'm with you, I'm fine with them adding in a crossbow for those who are so inclined, but do not take away my bow! I will fight them right in the face if I don't get my bow!