Don't even mention the word "crunchy" - it riles up my glutens something fierce! I assumed she meant she is lactose intolerant but got that mixed up in her addled, calcium-deficient brain.

Will there be 38 divorces in 38 countries?

"Calcium does such frightful things to my bones, making them so dense and heavy. Without calcium, I can live my life in brittle fragility as God intended."

A walk-in 40... I'm crying. I'm crying for the server. I'm crying for the host and bussers who had to put that table together. How does a group of 40 people not have a single person in it that says MAYBE THIS IS A BAD IDEA AND MAYBE THIS IS RUDE.

WHY CAN'T EVERYONE JUST DO THAT

I've worked in tons of restaurants in the midwest, and...this just kind of is. As in, it is true that back of house is full of wonderful Latino folks. And we all swear a lot. And they often swear in Spanish and you pick up some of it.

Clearly you have never worked in a restaurant. Swearing at customers and servers is a BOH pastime that unites all races.

The places I've worked have been more like 40% Hispanic, 50% African, and 10% young white potheads. I shouldnt have to tell you which group was useless

That place is right next door to my apartment. It doesn't surprise me the owners are Pakistani; one of the best kabob places in the area is in this shopping center (it has two branches next to each other, and one across the street) and is a very popular location.

The sea was angry that day, my friends. Like an old man trying to send soup back at a deli.

All I picture is:

one of the more subtle, yet important, political skills is "looking interested while a deranged person is shouting nonsense at you" and Ricky is CRUSHING IT in that regard

These stories always remind me of the Michael Scott Diversity Training

Whenever I see this guy's name all I think of is Engelbert Humperdinck. Or Prince Humperdink from Princess Bride. I really have no idea who Ansel Elgort is, other than some Bieber-looking dude who occasionally gets talked about on Jez.

George Gershwin didn't have help writing "Rhapsody in Blue." So, I really don't like it when people call me a DJ.

I have to agree. By themselves, yum. On things, cooked? NO.

Can we have a round of applause for all of the awesome managers this week? There is nothing more satisfying than a manager that has your back when a customer is being an asshole.

"Waiter! Bread sticks! And there's a small fleck of cheese on this table. Have it cleaned. Chop chop!" Needless to say, the evening went downhill from there.

I guess you can read racism into anything. But you do realize that besides Kimmy, the only "positive" characters are non-white? Do you think Dong—who is an immigrant—shouldn't have broken english? Should Tittus be a boring accountant instead of a fun gay? The maid in the bunker cares so little about white people that…