my mom sometimes eats peanut butter and Velveeta sandwiches

"Think of the banks!" - Nobody, ever

Your last paragraph — I was there with you. Pseudomedicine kills people.

Watch out for falling penises.

When I think "comparable" tickets, I think of tickets with a comparable view or location, not price point.

I also occasionally see rats humping and/or hobos peeing in the alley behind my office, so ... observe nature?

I create webinars and similar e-learning tools so that people we regulate know how to obey the law.

And you walked in and did what she did. Let's hear it for internetting.

But the singing is sooooo awful...

Like Olaf?

No. I have secondhand evidence that it's like a bag of sand.

Is it just me, or does she have a slight face of crazy eyes? Example:

There's a trainer at our gym who my wife and I LOOOOOVE to mock. The dude creeps on every woman in the place, and if you're blonde and under 40 he'll give you free pointers as he walks by so he can have an excuse to ogle.

There's far too much other people's business-minding at the damn gym, imho.

I've been stared at in a locker room, but just because I'm hairier than Chewbacca.

Old Navy does. My daughter has the same ridiculous rule at her school, and we were able to find them there.

My wife calls the liquor store a "Packie" (as in "Package Store").

The Offenderati, warning others that they're entering a ... place.. perhaps a zone... of peril... A DANGER ZONE, if you will.

Based on the idiot fucks who used to work in our kitchen, I'd promise them that no, they didn't want to order off menu.