Is a hot tub the best thing on earth, or is it even better than that? I would rather live in the shittiest apartment complex with a hot tub than the nicest house without one (this is probably not actually true, but you get the point).

I used to live in a house with a bunch of booze thieves. They were constantly drinking Natty Ice, and I always bought expensive beer. I ended up having to hide it all in my god damn room, because anytime I left they would drink it if I left it in the fridge. You gotta cut those people out of your life, or it will…

I just saw that video of Horner a little bit ago on the replay. Can't believe he was able to finish in that kind of condition.

It's either "Deadspin Up! All Night" or "Deadspin Up All Night!" depending on who you ask.

That is a good option. I'll keep it in mind. If you use tumblr, you should follow these dudes: [boatporn.tumblr.com]

Good lord, man. That is too far away. Hopefully I'll be retired by then and I can sail my own boat up to San Francisco to catch the race.

I watched some college sailing the other day. I assume the America's Cup is a little more exciting. I might have to get up to SF to check it out. I need something to do after I fail the Bar.

I don't understand why we as a society have decided that suits are acceptable and/or necessary to wear in the summer. Uh, your honor, it's 100 degrees outside.

I've been studying all day. Important question: why is deadspin's search feature so terrible? I had to look through the comments for every story for the whole day to find out what the hell you were talking about. Even though I typed the dude's username into the search bar. End rant.

+1

Soon 200 pound ladies are gonna be a size zero. This is all Tyra, Oprah, and Rosie's fault.

Duh.

Back in the day when I was trying to be a scenester hardcore kid, I wore girls jeans. And I was anywhere between a 0 and a 7, depending on the brand. It was pretty infuriating. So, yeah... I don't think there's a solution. It's all a conspiracy to make women and scenesters feel inadequate.

Okay. You just said they smell clean. I was confused about what was wrong if they were getting clean. In response to your question, I know nothing about plumbing. My answer is always ghosts, though. You know that.

I've heard that before. It sounds like it's probably true. I don't want to have a bunch of girls. So lame.

I don't get it. Ghosts made your washing machine work too well? Or you're putting clean clothes in the wash?

It's not just girls. In most brands I'm a 32/33ish. I tried to buy some pants at H&M that were a 32, and I couldn't get them on at all. They stopped about mid thigh. Could be because I'm totally buff though, and don't have scrawny H&M dude legs. This is a problem that we all must deal with, unfortunately.

Jon Benjamin Has a Van

I've been thinking about making one of those for the past couple hours. Unfortunately it's still disgustingly hot outside. I might have to just bite the bullet and turn up the AC so I can pretend it's nice and cool.