In case you need more of a reason to love Jenny Slate:

I think what annoys me so much about that mass hysteria was how it hurt a lot of people in the Wicca and Pangan communities. A lot of my family and friends are Wicca, some for over four generations and I've heard and seen of times where they've been harassed and abused by the overly moral Christians (which are a small…

"What's most insane about the entire saga is that Salem learned a lesson — and it was the wrong lesson."

Be White.

UNACCEPTABLE! I need a website where everybody has the same talking point and all the employees stick to said talking point. This website must also agree with me regardless of how illogical or hypocritical my beliefs are and never question it's truthfulness as long as it feels true. I will then dismiss other sites…

No, I can't get behind that. They just need to be recognized as people, not a subset of people who are necessarily more trustworthy than others.

What do you mean by 'You kind of people'!?

Well, it's not a theory, of course. But the idea that vaccines cause autism should die in a fire. Then, when the fire is out, I'd invite everyone to piss on the ashes.

Holy cats! I didn't expect to be featured for this!

Ah, sweet irony. My dad (who is probably writhing in hell right now) would not recognize himself as one of the kind of jerks depicted here, served in the Navy and would have definitely enjoyed the runny eggs story. But I can only imagine how many of his former servers could have written stories about him.

I was serving a grandfather and his teenage grandson. The kid asked for a bowl of chili, at which point I explained that we were out of chili, apologized (why we as servers have to do this, I don't know, but we do) and told him the other soups we had available. The kid said, "But I wanted the chili." Ok, well,…

If no one is starving in the street, how can I ever feel truly rich?

No pirates? Maybe for a awhile but eventually they'll up their game. They always do.

But what about robot pirates?

I vote for Paint Shop Pro. I have walked through many a Photoshop tutorial using PSP with no problem.

Corel Paint Shop Pro really deserves a mention. It can do probably 90% of what photographers use Photoshop for, at 1/10th of the cost. There are things that Photoshop is better at, but if you don't have the budget for Photoshop, I'd definitely recommend Paint Shop Pro.