Zagging us all through Twenty Serpenteen!

Nothing bc nothing there goes even close to plus-sized territory.

*laughs while being stabbed by wires attempting to reign in K-cup titties*

2 Seats for two hundred each!

This gave me chills because I got orchestra seats to Hamilton for less than 400 dollars last week. I’M SO EXCITED

I had someone in my coffee shop get mad at me last week because I was playing CHVRCHES in the cafe and called them "chaverches".

ALRIGHT. I'M GOING TO NEED PEOPLE FROM MY ALMA MATER TO STOP.

He looks like an older parallel universe Edward Norton if ol' Ed decided to pursue law at Yale.

"Obligatory girlfriends"? That's the band Haim, not some run-of-the-mill gal pal group tagging along with their famous friend T-Swift.

The link is dead yo

I attended Texas Tech for two years and shit like this is why I left. Perfect school if you're a male WASP who loves binge drinking and hating women!

Lubbock hasn't been dry for about five years now. I remember working as a cashier at United and seeing all the drunks stumble in the day we were allowed to sell booze.

Kudos to them if they can find ways to complement the flavor of latex. I made the mistake of going down on my boyfriend after he wore a condom and I swear that awful taste lingered for months.

Horrifying situation all around but imagine being The Guy That Gave TB to Babies

I'm glad Satan lives in the same city as I do. Makes me feel safe <3

I'm confused

Blasphemy.

you saw the opportunity for that headline and you took it. Brava.

wasabi?

Look at her being so nonchalantly badass. Good luck to her!