Yeah, that's what I thought. Pretty much everything but the Cadillac will cost you a king's ransom to get work done.

Beat me to it. Damnit.

Listen up, you automotive company rat bastards (especially you cocksuckers at GM). This old ass car had a 1.8L four banger that made 600 HP. If the CTS I buy this coming December doesn't have AT LEAST 1,000 HP with the 3.6TT engine (be happy I'm not demanding 1,200 HP) I am driving up to Detroit with my flack…

I caught that too.

Raging hormones of a 16 year old male in gym class + rubbing of the crotchal (yes I know that's not a word) region = 3/4 wood.

I'm not really a recovering alcoholic. I just play one on the Internet. LOL

Don't care for the back end much, but the front end makes me feel like I just climbed rope in gym class.

Look at the front end again... It'll wake you up.

You glorious bastards. I've been waiting for this moment for over a year. My future car. My wonderfully beautiful, twin-turbocharged future car.

Yes yes, the errant "is" made it in there. Sorry.

I knew it sounded like an old sound bite, so I surmised that it wasn't recorded right before he kicked the bucket in '09.

Jesus Christ, sweetheart! Get a fucking grip!!

Sooooo.... Are you being a troll or is there a fucking point to this wretched excuse of a comment?

I understand how it sounds like a BS story, but it's true. And no need to apologize; most people know the rule about "when in Rome...", but apparently these guys forgot about it. I actually arrived late to the party.

Damnit. This is what happens when you're posting when you should be sleeping.

I'll ignore the fact that this is Jalopnik and the post has nothing to do with cars, but...

Considering Paul Harvey is DIED a few years back, I figured he didn't rise from his grave to do the voice over. So, yeah, I realized that it was a speech taken off of another sound bite.

Funny story:

I'm guessing you live in an urban setting. I visit rural areas all the time and, brother, that ain't the way I see things there.

Seriously.