"Pardon me stewardess, I speak Jive."

Oh how I've wanted to do this, so many times. Just yesterday, I'm on my way home from the office. The highway I commute on has a 75mph speed limit and, at each speed limit sign, a sign that says "Left Lane for Passing Only". So, I set my cruise control at 80 mph and as I approach a slower moving car I signal, pull…

OK, "just rooting" might not be such a bad idea. I guess my problem with rooting my old phone was that I put CyanogenMod on it. Then you lose out on any OS updates and have to re-install the ROM each time you want a new CM upgrade (which is not as easy as an android update from Google or your phone maker or ISP). OK,…

Firstly, what you're talking about isn't taking the First Amendment literally, since the amendment says Congress shall make no law" and social consequences aren't Congress making a law.

I'm tired of seeing skinny 23 year old guys with Santa beards. Beards can back the fuck off.

I buy bedroom furniture, clean it up and paint it, and resell it for a nice profit. I do maybe 1-2 sets a week. I look on Craigslist, Facebook, garage sales, etc for old wood bedroom furniture. Facebook is the best deal because it's usually people who don't care about the money they just want to get rid of the…

Myself! And I love it. I didn't know how dependent I was until I lost my smartphone and didn't get a knew one. It feels great. You get to focus on people and situations, real situations and not the virtual ones. It is actually pretty depressing to see how people don't talk anymore. I feel free in a very strange way.…