Heck no. Not quoting her would be terrible journalism.

Sanitation. Definitely public sanitation.

I think we need to create a new trolling category called sexypasta, and this one should sit pretty close to the top. Any sex story that is so convoluted it was obviously fake, and yet so entertaining that nobody will look away or give up on it, would fall into the category.

Yay, we get an opportunity to loudly disapprove of someone’s lifestyle choices!

A 17 year old in 2016 would be on the tail end of that generation while a college kid in 2000 would be near the head of it. A generation covers 20 whole years. While some people argue for generation splits around the ‘3's or ‘4's in a decade (and I can see the case for that), you can roughly put the millenials as…

I tend to do Talbots outlet. They have their “outlet brand” which is not quite as strong as their store brand, but an awful lot of the items in the outlet were in the regular store catalogues last season. Finished seams and double stitching, quality fabrics from around the world, and other details mean that my best…

I love it more knowing that the "bad" spouse is in on the joke. I'm laughing with him/her, not AT him/her.

I know, I was thinking, “How can anyone be ‘too Carol Burnett?’” That’s like saying, "too much Christmas," or, "too many puppies and rainbows."

Oh crap, is it Disqus? I have to see if I can remember my danged login. At least it's not livefyre *shudder*

Definitely going to follow your column over to Wonkette. Thanks for the fun year of stories, and I’m glad that your career continues apace.

You take every nasty word you said back!

Sometimes it’s surreal even to us. (I'm a Texan- that's Southern with training wheels)

Thanks. Married into a South Louisiana family. Love the place to pieces, though the need for gainful employment has pulled us away.

Nope. I didn't.

It's Louisiana. You ask them, "Did my momma and your momma go to school together?" And when they blink and say no, you stick them to the back of the line. If they blink and say yes or give some indication that they are local, you smile, tell them you'll tell your momma you saw them, and know it's an effective threat…

I actually read it in the same voice as Patrick Stewart saying, “You will have the chicken!” to Steve Martin in L.A. Story.

Yeah, it’s the only meat that softens when you leave it on the grill for longer.

Whatever his motive, he may have saved someone's life - including the customers'. As for overserving, let's assume the customers sat there for four hours of trivia, drinking watery, cut-rate margaritas. That means they got 1.5 drinks per hour worth of alcohol if they even got a full serving in those icy sugar bombs,…

“One Tuesday at the office, my boss asked me if I wouldn’t mind volunteering to help with registration for an event being put on by one of our pro bono clients, a high-profile ethics-focused non-profit (whatever that means). “

My husband managed to avoid being robbed in his pizza delivery days, but one of his coworkers did not. Luckily the manager decided not to let his deliverers go to that complex any more. There had already been some scams and other sketchy situations, and it was obviously just escalating.