from carly’s own stupid mouth-hole:

Dad? He's 36!

It’s a common internet throwdown, like, it means “you couldn’t be more wrong so you should just leave forever”, in the dialect of us young internet types. It also implies that the speaker is very secure in themselves, because it’s quite a lighthearted phrase. It’s the internet equivalent of him saying something and…

Full disclosure: I’m an old and had to have one of my students explain it to me.

Textual diarrhea. It’s worse than verbal diarrhea, because it will live on the Internet forever.

A strong argument for the people who believe that white people shouldn’t say “woke”?

I understand that, according to the constitution, Obama needs to step down as president but what’s the law on Michelle staying on as FLOTUS?

Or punctuate! Full sentences! Sad!!!1!!

Isn’t it amazing how we have free will and if the podcast isn’t playing the exact content we want at the moment we have the power to turn it off and do something else. Amazing isn’t it? On the other hand, maybe some of my fellow penis bearers could shut the fuck up and listen and maybe learn some shit they aren’t…

Naked women with seductively arched backs are freer. Like lions.

Yes, we learned how empowering this “women taking off their clothes for critters bullshit” is from PETA.

Part of me is like “dope. fierce.” and part of me is like “is the declaration that women have more than just aesthetic value really helped by nudity and smizing?”

When I was 18 and voting, I had been on the internet for two years and it was still people figuring out that AOL wasn’t the best idea. Some people at 18 did not have access to the amazing wealth of knowledge that we have online today. Some of us are older than that.

Agreed. I usually hear it spouted by people who had no head when they were 20, and never decided to get one.

“If you’re not a liberal when you’re 20, you have no heart. If you’re not a conservative when you’re 40, you have no head.”

Starred because it deserves to be ungreyed. But I disagree that conservative policies are reasonable about money - see our military spending, the long term cost of cutting funding to health care, social safety nets, and education. It doesn't matter if you save a dime here if you lose a dollar later because your…

Does it honestly not bother you that Bernie supporters are sending death threats to a woman who, as far as I can tell, was just doing her job? I get wanting to have positive coverage of your preferred candidate, but any coverage of the event that leaves out the booing and death threats is still pretty slanted - it’s…

It depends. Have you ever done anything that could be described by anyone as “cunty” “shrill” or “hysterical”? If so, or even if not, you should step back and have a few babies and rethink your place in society.

If it was a pantsuit, then no go.