No. That's not what he is saying. He is just saying that he wants to hide behind "due process" as his out so that he can have a better chance to win football games. This doesn't show that he doesn't think the facts are that bad, it just shows what kind of emphasis these people put on a fucking football game.

I haven't played Sims since the 1st one, but I remember killing them was a pain. I put them in a box, and since I had to listen to them cry for days, I put a phone in there so they could at least answer the phone. Answering the phone in that game was hard to do before they hung up. But alas, the hungry Sim kept…

Psst, should we tell these cretins about the Catholics?

The Vikings could always pull a switcharoo, which Adrian Peterson believes to be beating the hell out of a wallaby.

How did Texas get that option in the first place? The loser doesn't just decide they want to kick off.

The real story horrifying sports story comes on Monday, when [quarterback] goes down Sunday and Skip Bayless's sources tell him that Tebow's still in football shape.

This isn't as bad a move as the Cavs GM that once thought that Danny Ferry "had a little talent in him" before the 1990 NBA Draft.

Given the week so far, any guesses as to what terrible sports story comes out on Friday?

Pretty sad that the kid actually playing football is the only one not carrying.

Wow, so many apologies in a row; it's like he's in the Cal-zone!

If your BAC reads like an area code, you're gonna have a bad time.

That loud sound you hear isn't the sound of applause for this move , it's the sound of the Ravens' collective hamstrings snapping from all that backpedaling.

I read "accidental blowjob" and thought there would be a humorous story about a donkey show gone awry. Was disappointed...

Misread the headline 6 different times as Never Trust Your Kids Around The Olbermann. Still stands.

A nice tribute to someone who I never particularly cared for as a comedian but I respected the hell out of for being a trailblazer.